Here you cannot forget or remember

Useless Guys

“The very idea that you need to be something different that you are, the idea that there is something you can get, all that was placed into you!” ......UG Krishnamurti .

A reflection appearing confused

Morning walk

Sometimes I can wake up in the morning and feel like I have had enough. Enough of the whole thing in the sense that I have to do something to make something of myself. It is like a confused message maybe a mild depression , yet not like the one Lord Ram had (as depicted in the Yoga Vasistha). That you have to show the world that you are doing right and good and on the other hand here is another world, another layer which is secret and in a lot of ways ,unspoken. It is the intimate side of seeing without having all this commentary and expectations from society or the mind. It is the silent and immediate

ordinariness of just being where you are which is contented. The people I meet and friends tell me this story one way or another or they convey some secret life in bits and pieces just enough to hear before I jump in my van and go home. Either they can say 'so what!’, and in so doing, reveal some ordinariness to me . Otherwise they ride the wave of wonder and see in delight .Some great experience which arrives in this silent and never ending self. This experience then disappears to absolve everything including the experience. How this is known I have no idea, but can only see the path and invisible line which runs there or here.

From itself to itself

What am I writing about? You may ask .Well it’s about what happens to us everyday, either you have a good day or you have a bad day or you have some underlying unsatisfactory feeling that lurks just there in the back ground while your having a good day :) or neither . Meanwhile I will get on with the job of being sucessful in this world. So something is missing in that ,and we have to look and see what the missing one is all about. Where is the gap gone that we have to fill? Now when we have a chance and really see.

See Ying Yang

And that means having a really good direct look at yourself, we will see or experience a place where our mouth is shut and our senses will be still and listening will be muted. Then nothing is missing and all is without words or understanding. Instead we are just as we are without any understanding. Passing all understanding as the biblical saying goes ‘the peace that passeth understanding ’.Here you cannot forget or remember anything, and your memory is not needed. So this raises another curious question can an Alzheimer patient forget themselves?

Sunrays

Yet aside from this you may ask how does this happen? How and what are you talking about?.......... “Of course I am happy; I’m not having midlife crisis like you are. I 'm not waiting for the love of my life. I’m just cruising along singing my song and people are very loving all the time, or I am or if I’m not I’m trying to be” ……………. "Consider the lilies of the fields" …………….I hear a voice drop into the quiet pool of my mind. I certainly have to let you know that I am not going to tell you something that you do not know. That you do know the answer is something that most teachers and masters will tell you blatantly. For example one wild and wise friend of mine has said “You are asking questions to which you already have the answers. If you did not have the answer, you could not have the question.” Or just go to any Satsang now a days and you will hear the same message that has been told thousands of years before Christ, any good Vedantin will tell you “You are whole and complete as you are” already.



In the fullness is the fullness.

Why just look at the mantra that begins in the Ishavasyo Upanishad:

Om pUrNamadah pUrNamidam pUrNAt pUrNamudachyate pUrNasya pUrNamAdAyapUrNamevAvashiShyateOm shAntih, shAntih, shAntihi

[Completeness is that, completeness is this,from completeness, completeness comes forth.Completeness from completeness taken away,completeness to completeness added,completeness alone remains.Peace, peace, peace!]

Om
So, you are complete, whole and action less. Yet you can have a house full of books and still try to get something, to acquire; that state of unending perfect happiness. And this can never be a state you can have permanently. Yet you are already the something that you are missing, not only that, you are NOT this some thing (you are NOT separate) and this you have to find out for yourself:) To sit quietly and see is what matters and to see without seeing with a wandering mind that wants to fix and understand. To understand this you have to feel deeper than your thoughts. By feel I do not mean emotionally but to look directly at existence and plunge to where this comes from.

Going to the Roots

Do you see the infinity of yourself? Is it not unending? You cannot take away or add anything to the nature that is you. Does this mean I know more than you or that you know more than me? What am I understanding? Or is it beyond understanding.

You cannot take away or add anything

Looking and not looking happen within this unending nature. Expectation, unsatisfactory feelings arise in this unending vision. The appearance of coming and going can hypnotize us into believing that we are not complete .As one good friend advised me when I told him about a relationship that was not going right , “ Don’t let this ruin your holiday!” Well is this complete? It certainly looks unfinished but I can't continue further than this .

All of the Above

The sea this morning .

This morning I walked outside and saw a kestrel hovering over the dune , the sea is calm and a lone trawler drifts near the shore , a light sparkling like a luminous beacon . Within my heart is an open space which reflects the world and I feel like I am kissing this open mirror which is reflecting everything . It is moments like this where I can see the easyness of this direct reflection of Self , and that the mind can be like a restless ocean waving up and down with the images of people and events that have taken place recently .

A true friend.

These impressions can stir up the thoughts that are gross in that they depict the stories of 'you' and 'other' . I wander, how it is happening , and the mirror has no say in it . The pure reflection just is and the mind in its nature is waving in images and pictures which I can grab hold of or just let pass .People say "Oh let it go ! it's just the past " and yet I cannot ignore it . I can also choose not to place too much attention on these images which invest in holding .

Honesty.

Honesty is one of the qualities that I like to have with others and I have been finding lately that certain people (certainly most people that I have befriended) have not been clear with this , I find that I can not help but read their faces and their actions . Like a mirror can reflect ,it can also reveal the lines in the image of the other.Once I sat in a peaceful park a few years ago and an old man came up to me and looked into my eyes , he smiled and I smiled back , not wanting anything . Then he suddenly grabed me and started to pull me up . I had to push him away because I could not see what he was seeing . Obviously he wanted to possess what was'nt in his warped mind , the space of quietness.If you see from an innocent space you cannot imagine what others are saying or thinking , but as someone said to me lately maybe I am abit 'naieve'. This pure screen of mirrorness is not involved at all and yet there is like a need for me to be aware of situations like this . It is similar to seeing a truck tearing down the road towards a little puppy which I can reach out and remove . If I ignore the puppy it will be pulverised , yet I can reach out and pick it up and take it back to the mother under the tree .

Seeing Mirrorlike

One of the early teachings I received was from a Tantric master who was teaching about honesty , and I have been reminded of that way when I see this situation . The mind is dishonest because it is perverted in its way and emotionalism can rule in place of honesty .Also the mind is not the enemy because we cannot kill the mind with the mind . It can be used as a tool , but it can also wander like an aimless dreamer and it can shift and move like a good manipulator . With this is the dishonesty and it manifests in different shapes and forms .Being polite but not saying really what's going on is a way that it plays it's game . It is then that the classic analogy about the mind in the masters household comes up , and that is why meditators have been meditating ;in order to replace that disorder and show the mind that the master is present also . Like a teacher entering

Sri Yantra

a classroom full of rowdy students the prescence of the master or teacher makes them sit still . I see how this mind can play like this when some days it is turbulantly wandering aimlessly . Wandering aimlessly is not the problem but letting it get to you is . Once again I wandered into the Sauna and observed a ghost appearing before my eyes and this ghost tried to convince me of its reality .Seeing clearly that there is no body to control all of this, definitely destroys the idea that you are the choppy mind and it's contents , yet the habit to grab hold of thoughts can still be there in its habit form . A ghostly habit form which makes up the feeling of your individuality , if you keep looking at the ghost the ghostliness is seen .Could you be a ghost?? I have observed this a thousand times in a thousand ways and some times a spark of 'aha!' comes and other times it's so quiet, it's a feather floating. This is seeing the same spark floating up in a thousandth way .As the Zen saying goes , " This , This aThousand times This!!!".

The crystal is you, who is looking.

"Just as a transparent crystal takes on the lines of it's Background, but is in no way changed thereby,and just as the unchanging moon on being reflected on undulating (wavelike)surfaces appears agitated, so is it with You, the all prevading."

Hastamalaka Stotra

Which leads me to the topic of the mirror like space which is one of my portals. The closest depiction of this is a picture a friend in Tiruvannamalai showed me painted by M C Escher , I was very pleased to be shown this picture .It demonstrates this portal closely , but you must see from behind Escher's eyes to become Escher .Someone told me once "But what about the space between the crystal and the eyes of the holder? " some people over analyse! I can see from a mirror like space , the body in this space , including space itself and others are included.This sensation is very similar to gazing into a mirror and finding that you are no longer the observer or the observed but rather an undefined prescence.There is a joy when seeing this infinite clear openess. Because it ( and clearly it is not an object; because it is who you are) includes ALL OF THE ABOVE !

Kingdom Within

This is it ! Is it not amazing that you can think such a thing ? That you ever feel that you are somebody walking around doing things ? Well have'nt you been on this planet long enough to look at yourself ?

'Yes!' you tell me . 'I have studied this and that , I have finished education, I am now helping people in society and I am practicing meditation . I am getting somewhere , I am endevouring to become enlightened' or 'I'm not getting anywhere, what's this? a load of crap?'

Have you looked closer than the actions you undertake everyday to inform others about yourself , or that you give to yourself ? Wandering from building to building ,talking about this and that ,dodging traffic, swearing at the driver in front of you , Yes please take a deep breath while you frenzy the day ! Do you ever consider to look within ?

What does that mean ?

Have you taken the time to see who you really are ? Really ?


Poke yourself ! Yes,...... just do that ! lift your finger and look at it . Then poke yourself . Where did you feel your fingertip ? Did it stab you somewhere in the chest area? Most people do , a very wise and gentle man in India, pointed this out sometime in the 40's . That when we point to ourselves we point to the chest area . Why? Because we take ourselves to be the shape and form of the physical body that seemingly shows the world who we are , we point to the heart area because we are the heart itself . By heart I do not mean physical but something far greater which has the capacity to see everything and hold every sight which we see , and evey feeling which we are able to perceive .Is this capacity different or separate from us ? Christ says the "Kingdom of Heaven is within! " . A great pointer and yet we take ourselves to be the mansions or the walls that form the image of who we are , we take the senses as ourselves because it is so real ! 'How can you doubt such a thing ?' You may say.

Now wait a minute .
Do you really believe that you are just made up of flesh bones and the full sensory capacity of the human body ?
No wonder scientist say you are only using 10% of your brain . What if there is some thing more than this body and mind that you take yourself to be .

The question must arise 'Who am I ?' or 'What am I ?' or even 'Where did I come from ?' And now arises the oportunity to inquire , and this is how every moment has the value of a treasure house.

Now without further ado , take this very moment to investigate and see YOURSELF as you really are .

What do I do ?

Well you have the greatest gift to begin with ,and that is YOU .Start penetrating yourself! Just as you are , seeing these words , just as you are looking at this screen . Investigate this feeling of being............ by resting with the feeling of being, just as you are, right now and with this in a very relaxed and gentle way................. see and penetrate into this feeling of being.Continue and avail yourself of the ocean which is with in you .

Jesus said, "I will give you what no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, what no hand has touched, what has not arisen in the human heart."

See where does this feeling of existing come from . Does it begin or end ?does it have a shape ? Is it vegetarian ? Is this separate and intimate to you ? Or is it intimate and closer than your very breath? does it come and go ? Is it changing?

The disciples said to Jesus, "Tell us, how will our end come?"
Jesus said, "Have you found the beginning, then, that you are looking for the end? You see, the end will be where the beginning is.
Congratulations to the one who stands at the beginning: that one will know the end and will not taste death."


For this has been written and talked about from ancient times , in the Vedas and Upanishands before the scriptures of the Christian Bible and Apocrypha were ever written and in times of great peace and harmony and it has lasted because it has the capacity of everlasting life . And these ancient lovers of truth say it is no other than Yourself . Unlimited, unbound , untouched and unutterable . No wind can destroy , no fire can burn , no flood can drown , no earth can move , no space can contain You!

Now where are your comments?

Essence of Joy

Being pure consciousness, do not disturb your mind with thoughts of for and against. Be at peace and remain happy in yourself , the essence of joy.

-Astavakra Gita-

Garuchati Falls

I am without begining , middle , and end. I am never bound .By nature

I am pure and perfect - this is my firm conviction.

-Avadhuta Gita-

Sitting in a stream under a small fall I am happy to rest . This place is called Garuchati .It is very peaceful place where the forrest meets water that flows into Ganga .

Nothing Happening

How can there be birth,karma,or responsibility

In that one unchanging, peaceful,unblemished and infinite

Consciousness which is you ?

-Ashtavakra Gita-

Waves in the Sea

Your nature is the consciousness , in which the whole world wells up, like waves in the sea. that is what you are,without any doubt, so be free of disturbance.

-Ashtavakra Gita-

In a moments

On a holy

River

A moment is captured

Free of the past

Of movement without any taint

A dance, in joy!

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Surrender

The softest thing can overcome the hardest,

Formless, it can enter where there are no gaps or space.
-Lao Tzu

Feeling the pain within yourself ,
You can let softness touch it
And soak into it.

Until there is no more .

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Sitting Silently

- What's that man doing by the mountain there?
-Let's go and ask him.
-Are you sitting here waiting for a friend?
-No
-Then you are here to breathe the fresh air, right?
-No
-Then why are you sitting here?
-I am just sitting.

Most people live in a dualistic world of gains and losses, self and object. If the scenery is beautiful, I'm happy ;if not , I'm disappointed.

Right Now

Here it is , right now .start thinking about it and you miss it .

-Tao Shan-

Omni

All around

Within without,

Without within,

An ocean clear!

Through the seen

Shines the unseen.

This transcends all laws

They say it is hard

Yet it is easy.

This body of thought peels

At each outbreath.

So in breath gives way

To Another layer ,

Gone.

A soft ocean!

Space looks through my eyes.

It touches who

I've taken myself to be.

The Self deathless

Embraces,

No starting point

No going point.

Gazing into this ocean

My own heart !

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Great Mystery

There is no greater mystery Than this

-That , being the reality

We seek to gain reality.

We think that there is something

Hiding our reality

And that it must be destroyed

Before the reality is gained.

It is ridiculous.

A day will dawn

When you will yourself

Laugh at your past efforts.

That will be on the day you laugh

Is also here and now .

-Ramana Maharshi-

Have you been to places

Where you are alone

When you see the beauty

You feel that your at Home

How you come to see this

Mystery in a day

Here this very moment

The gift of your life hail!

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Awake While Asleep

Shun once asked Cheng:

-Can the Dao be possessed?

-You don't even possess your own body.

How could you possess the Dao?

-If my body doesn't belong to me , who does it belong to?

-Your body, your life , your children and grandchildren are all

temporary gifts from nature.How can you say they are yours?

For a person of the Dao , to ignorantly believe that he owns his own body is a kind of confusion . to intentionally try to possess the Dao is also a confusion .

When asleep to the world

The world does not exist.

When asleep to dreaming

Dreams do not exist.

When asleep to sleeping

Sleep does not exist.

When asleep to awakening

The awakend does not exist.

Who is it that never sleeps ,dreams or awakens?

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Laughing Shiva

Only now there is

This moment To meet Shiva.

To offer a flower

Unsmelt

And to have it

Consumed by the Divine cow!

Your laughter drifts

Down the Ganga .

A smile , a joy

Untold .

Copyright m.m.

Open Sky

Seeing clearly the heart

Full of essence ever

Open sky.

Untouched, unbecome

No way for going,

Go beyond!

Can you see firey stars

Without the night?

Look far away

Beyond all time

Past, present and future

And what remains?

Eternal nature of your Self.

Look close into your

Nature of existing

Until it touches

What cannot become.

Your an open sky!

YES YOU!

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Without A Trace

Like a golden flower of raindrops

This silence ever unfolding

Bird on a wing

Leaving no footprints

In the blue sky

I fly with you

I fly with you

Burn all the bridges behind

The sun never meets the moon

The river runs to the ocean

I'll only be drowned by you .

Just as the wandering mind

Is seeking for peace

In it's futility.

It is revealed to be

Like fish in a sea, so thirsty.

And just as the sun never comes and

Meets the moon,

The mind bows to give way

To the mystery.

The invitation is to

Fly like a bird to the sky,

Where you cannot see any trace of footprints.

They are left behind,

Now you walk without feet and fly without wings,

And the flowers shower.

copyright: m.m.

Mystic Heart

Deep within the mystic heart . An ocean open burns in love
a crest of joy rises to hail !

See within yourself there is an spacious ocean!
It spreads it's wings like a sea of angels reaching throughout the horizons of your heart,
it continues without a begining or ending.
is it any different from yourself?
Just as a ring made of gold ,
has the same goldness in all the rings of gold !
So you yourself are gold.

Where do you begin and where do you end ?
"I am the alpha and the omega ". Is this not a complete circle without beginging or end?

Sink beneath the ocean waves of your searching wandering mind and dive into the circle of your Self ,free from the surface of waves dying and returning .

The space behind your eyes are unending .
This is the heart of everything!
Look into your own nature
your eternal nature unborn, undying.
Kabir says 'remove your veil and you will meet your beloved'

Rumi turns within that space !
The unchanging center is eternally here .
No wonder he falls to the ground with intoxication!

Stay here and bliss arises , it is a kiss from Kabir !
'In the temple of the heart a flame is burning .Don't move from this place.'

Your own Self Kissing, Yourself!
Plunge and see !

copyright m.m.